The Unexpected God
by GothicVampireChicka
Summary: John already knows Loki and Thor, due to Loki deciding John is to be his betrothed. To avoid this he fled to Earth, never expecting to see them again. He also never suspected he'd be working with S.H.I.E.L.D. again.
1. Chapter 1

For John, it had been such a mundane and rainy day, which, although it was a usual day for London, was a boring change for John. Instead of chasing down criminals with Sherlock, he was diagnosing and giving out prescriptions for the common cold and other routine viruses.

'Dull' thought John, reminding himself of Sherlock 'Oh geez, people are right, he really is beginning to rub off on me.'

Throughout the day, Sherlock hadn't texted John, which was only odd thing of the day. 16 common cold, 3 ear infections, and 1 unexpected pregnancy later, John had finished with all of his patients and headed home to 221B.

When had John entered the flat he noticed the symbolic umbrella.' Oh jeez, here we go again.' Assuming Mycroft was here to make Sherlock do the leg work he didn't feel like doing, John began to prepare tea and braced himself for their usual childish arguments. However, as John began distributing the tea, he noticed the unusual complacent aura around the brothers.

"John, how would you like to meet the famous American heroes, The Avengers?" was Sherlock's greeting.

Knowing this would cause complications that could change his life as he knew it; John interjected "I have work"

"Well, Mycroft can get you off easily enough" replied Sherlock

"I was planning on visiting Harry" was John's next excuse "

You hate being around her" stated Sherlock

"I was going to meet Lestrade at the pub?" tried John

"Dull, I'm certain our DI can live without your presence at the pub for another week or so." Retorted Sherlock

During this argument Mycroft's eyebrow had risen at John's surprising reluctance to go. "Honestly Sherlock, you might at least explain to him the case before you drag him around the globe

"Fine" said Sherlock " John, Mycroft wants me to act as sort of diplomat between The Avengers and The British Government, in order to get some answers as to what has happened as of late and to perhaps make it possible for The British Government to defend itself against future attacks."

"You?" John asked with humor "Mycroft, how is this even a remotely good idea? You do know Sherlock gets with other humans, right?"

"John, my past attempts have failed due to The Avengers…..personalities." said Mycroft. "Since then it has become apparent that we need someone with similar…..eccentrics for this to work. Sherlock is the most logical choice."

"It also doesn't hurt that I'm THE British Government's brother." Muttered Sherlock

John, still surprised by Mycroft's decision didn't realize Sherlock was still ignoring his protests and was telling Mycroft that they'd be ready any day the escort decided to appear.

"Excellent, an agent should arrive within a few days to escort you to their headquarters. John, you'll mind Sherlock won't you?" ordered Mycroft. Then, without waiting to hear John sputtering out more protests, left the flat.

** Page Break**

Oddly enough, the agent decided to appear at one of their crime scenes.

Sherlock and John had just arrived at the scene of what appeared to be a blood bath. Everything in the victim's room was bloody. It was during Sherlock's usual rant of police incompetence and how obvious everything was that John noticed her. It was hard not to, it had been a few years and she had changed her hairstyle but, she stuck out like a sore thumb and was easy enough to identify in her usual uniform.

John walked up to her and began with "Hey Natasha, been awhile, eh?"

"Since you flew off the grid and haven't been heard from in 3 years? Yea, I'd say so." She replied in her usual tone

"I'm assuming you're the one taking Sherlock to his next case? Unless you just so happen to be a witness. Again." said John

"Oh not that again, I play that card once…" replied Natasha "But, I thought you were coming with."

"What? Oh no, Sherlock wasn't listening to me again and just decided I was. I'd rather stay here and…avoid any situations that may arise."

Lestrade, having noticed John's easy conversation with the unknown woman, walked over. "Lo' John" He said "Mind introducing us?"

"Sure, Lestrade, this is Agent Romanov, she's taking Sherlock to his next case." "Natasha, this is DI Lestrade, the man who somehow got conned into letting Sherlock consult for him" said John

"You're Sherlock's next victim? My condolences." said Lestrade with a smile."John, you're not going with him this time? Jeez what'd he do this time?"

"Nothing" John assured him "He just picked a time when my schedule wasn't open"

During this conversation, Sherlock had finished insulting the police and had headed over to them.

"John! We're done here; we're on our next case." Sherlock's declaration was met with shared grins from John and Lestrade.

"Ah, Sherlock just in time, this is Agent Romanov." "Natasha, this is of course, Sherlock Holmes." Once again John was playing wing-man. "Sherlock, I had hoped you'd remember. I'm not going this time.

"Natasha?" asked Sherlock "Hmm intriguing, so you have met before and are obviously close, where do you two know each other from?" inquired Sherlock.

'Shit' thought John. Quickly coming up with an excuse John said "She was a friend of one of my patients from the army."

Natasha raised an eyebrow questionably but, said nothing. The excuse of how they knew each other seemed boring and acceptable to Sherlock, so he moved on.

"John, of course you're coming! You need to blog about this and 'mind' me as Mycroft elegantly phrased it."

"Sherlock, I'm fairly certain this case will remain classified for at least 50 years and you can text me when the fists begin to fly."

"But I already packed your things for you! I made Mycroft get you off work. I also told Harry and Lestrade about our newest case, so you have no legitimate excuse to miss this….Unless there's something else you haven't told me."

John said nothing, not wanting to cause anymore drama. Sherlock, taking this as John's submission, turned to Natasha and said "Miss Romanov, we'll be ready to go as soon as we can pick up our luggage at home."

"It's already in the car I brought." was Natasha's reply.

"Well, at least you haven't wasted my time yet." replied Sherlock, always needing to get the last word in.

**Page Break**

After departing the crime scene, they headed straight for the airport and S.H.I.E.L.D.'s private jet. At the sight of the jet John stopped dead in his tracks.

"Oh come now, you've gotten this far." stated Sherlock as he grabbed John's wrist and proceeded to drag John to the jet.

When the jet took off John looked out the window as if he wanted to jump out and fly away. Throughout the ride, Natasha had begun asking questions about John's current life, as a decent way to distract him. Despite John's questions they mostly talked about John's life seeing as Natasha's was classified but, she at least let him know how Clint was doing. She also told him all about Stark and his annoying childish personality, which made John laugh.

She had tried debriefing Sherlock on the other Avengers as well, but he was in his mind palace and when they attempted to bring him out, he declared he didn't want them ruining the surprise and opportunity to show off. He did however, pay attention to John and his reactions.

'Interesting, Mycroft didn't mention John's history with Romanov and he misses nothing…' thought Sherlock.

He noticed John was somewhat warming up to the idea to meet everyone but, when the name Thor came up, he paled and became less eager.

'Hmm, I'll have to file that away.'

When John had heard that Thor, Thor! The brother of the guy that made him flee from Asgard, would be there, he nearly demanded the jet be turned around and that he return home. Heck, was almost willing to open the emergency door and fly back. But, that would cause Sherlock to ask questions he didn't want to answer and for him to possibly have to leave Sherlock. John didn't want this and decided he would simply avoid Thor like the plague. Perhaps Thor wouldn't recognize him, he did look somewhat older and different than when Thor had last seen him. Sherlock would also be dragging him around as usual and he could hide in his room….. While these hopes were distracting John, he hadn't realized the jet had landed and that there was no last minute escape possible.

**End**


	2. Chapter 2

The jet had landed and John and Sherlock had recovered their luggage, they headed outside. In the airport 's parking lot, Natasha waited near a S.H.E.I.L.D. van.

"C'mon, it seems Barton decided to take over as chauffeur when he heard you were coming. Let's just be glad it wasn't Stark." Natasha said as she led them to the car.

Clint turned to see the group walking towards the car. It had been a while since he had seen John after all.

"And so the doctor lives" Clint said in greeting as he looked at Natasha to hurry up. He didn't feel like waiting all day.

Sherlock looked from John to the two agents, trying to deduce how they met. He knew that John was one mystery he had not gotten all the answers to yet. How did John even keep a secret like this from him?

"John, this man was neither one of your patients nor is he related to Agent Romanov. Obviously it had to be in Afghanistan but they weren't soldiers. Where did you meet them?" he asked

"Clint and Natasha were friends of a patient of mine and visited frequently." John replied as he gave the two a smile.

He knew it had to irk Sherlock to know he did not know everything about him. He was more than glad about that since it was near impossible to keep a secret from that man. It was annoying that Sherlock would keep asking questions until he got all the answers. Clint gave Natasha a questioning look at how Sherlock knew that. Natasha gave him a shake of the head as they were not informed that another agent would be along. Sherlock did not even look like he could take a punch.

Piling into the car, the ride to Avengers Tower was silent mostly from John's apprehension and the others not having anything to talk about. If they really had questions to ask, it could be figured out at the tower. When they finally arrived, Natasha began giving them warnings about the other Avengers.

"First off, do not ever get Banner mad. Second, do not engage Stark when he starts mouthing off, you will never win and it just encourages him. Lastly, stay out of the labs, their personal rooms, and DO NOT touch any weapons you may see."

As Sherlock heard the rules, he could not help but give a frown. How was he supposed to get the maximum data on the Avengers if he was not allowed to touch? The advanced technology of the towers alone would be able to give him a wide range of experiments to conduct. Just imagining the labs inside made Sherlock practically tremble with excitement. Rules be damned, he was going to find a way to experiment without causing too much trouble.

He and John followed Natasha and Clint out of the car and took in their surroundings. For all the differences between the two, Manhattan's busy streets almost reminded Sherlock and John of London.

"How many Avengers are currently residing here?" he asked as he glanced at John to see his expression.

"There are five of us here as of recent. Thor is the only one not here. He does his monthly check up on his brother's imprisonment around this time. He should be back soon." Clint said

John schooled his face into a blank slate, knowing Sherlock was looking at him. He was internally relieved that the Asgardian was gone for the moment.

'Maybe there won't be any trouble after all.' he thought.

Grabbing the luggage out the trunk, they walked inside of the tower. It was just breathtaking. It was easy to see that someone had spent good money decorating the place. John's mouth nearly fell open at the modern layout and seeing a few robots doing cleaning work. Sneaking a glance at Sherlock, he could see that the man was somewhat impressed if the slight raising of his eyebrows was anything to go by. Natasha cleared her throat to get their attention and John had the decency to look sheepish.

She gave a small smile before taking the lead as tour guide. "While in the Tower, you will need to be with or have the permission of an Avenger to enter or leave the tower." This is the entry hall and the elevator we will be taking is where some of us live in the upper floors. You will be staying there as well. I believe everyone knows you have arrived so it would be best if we get up there before they get distracted." She explained, ushering them in as the elevator opened.

Inside the elevator, Sherlock stared at Clint and itched to deduce him, He knew he promised John he would behave but would not get an opportunity again. He took a breath before going into his deduction and ignoring the look John gave him. Clint looked at him with a slight widening of the eyes. How could anyone figure out where and what he did just by looking? Then again, he had seen and heard much stranger things.

"So did you kill him while on a rooftop or on a ledge?" Sherlock asked as the elevator doors opened.

Clint had no clue how Sherlock knew that and pretended not to hear the question. Taking over the tour, he led them to the main living room.

"This is the main living room/meeting room. We usually do our business and debriefing of missions here. 'Tasha, I'll take them to their apartments while you go get the others." he explained as he started to lead them to the personal elevator.

Natasha left them to it as she went to search for the others.

"Sherlock, you will be staying a floor up in-between Steve and Thor. John, you'll be staying on this floor between Natasha and I, just like old times." he said with a slight grin. "Stark stays up in his penthouse when he does not pass out in the work shop and Banner lives down on the bottom floor."

He showed Sherlock to his room first. Sherlock opened the door and put his luggage by the door. He gave a look around, taking in the modern and tasteful style. It was much bigger than their flat back at home. There was even a small kitchen that he was sure could fit in an experiment or two.

After looking at Sherlock's room, Clint showed John to his room. It was built nearly identical to Sherlock's room. John nodded his thanks to Clint as he set his luggage down.

As they shuffled away from John's room, Clint corralled them back to the meeting room. When they entered, they were greeted by the sight of all of the Avengers assembled.

Natasha figured it was time to take the lead again as Clint found himself a spot on the couch to sit. "Everyone, Mr. Sherlock Holmes and Dr. John Watson." she introduced, gesturing to them as she did so.

"Are they the new British diplomats?" Steve asked "Do they already know who we are?"

"No. That would ruin The Game." Sherlock interjected before Steve could say anymore.

"Sherlock. Seriously? Right now?" John said, knowing the git could not resist a new audience.

Sherlock ignored John and was about to put his deductions to work. He wanted to see what was so special about the Avengers after all. Taking in everything he could see about Steve, he could not help but smirk.

"You must be Steve Rogers. Obviously you're from another time. Most likely you're from the 40's judging by your hair and clothing style. Your stance says military so you had to fight in World War II. Fascinating! You can't age yet you can be injured seeing as there is bruising on your knuckles from boxing. You must be the Captain America. Who created you?" Sherlock said.

"Impressive, you pay attention to the media and got a hold of a couple of files." said a man with an impressive goatee, wearing jeans and an ACDC T-shirt.

"The media? How dull. No, my brother just gave me a list of your names as requested. It would be too boring if I already knew everything. I am just deducing." Sherlock replied.

At hearing this, Tony seemed interested and said "Okay. Let's see what you can 'deduce' about me."

John figured from that comment that the other man must be Tony Stark. They had been warned that there was no one snarkier than Stark. The problem was that he did not want Sherlock causing trouble. Two geniuses in a verbal row did not sound so exciting when Sherlock was tactless. The worse thing anyone could do was give Sherlock incentive to deduce them.

John, turning to Sherlock said "Now I realize he is really asking for it but, please do not get him so angry that you get thrown out of a window. We are really high up and I don't think I could save you." he warned, much to the amusements if the other occupants in the room.

"Fine.", Sherlock huffed "I will leave out the father issues."

Turning to Tony, Sherlock said, "You are Anthony Stark and in your mid-thirties. You are used to finer taste, if the décor of the building says anything. You have to be a billionaire to afford even one item in here. The glowing from your chest is not a fashion statement; I am assuming it is used as some type of battery that is protecting your heart from something life threatening. It wouldn't be there for any other purpose. At first, I thought it was powered by palladium but that does not seem to be the case. Perhaps you substituted it with an unknown element? Also, your long term girlfriend broke up with you recently. It had to do with not being available enough judging by the old and frequent oil stains on your jeans. You have begun drinking heavily again as a result. Now, as to you have made your fortune, I'm sure you used to work as a weapons contractor. However, you quit recently. Was it due to the torture-"

John cut off Sherlock when he realized how personal he was getting.

"Sherlock! I told you, if they decide to kill you, not even Mycroft can stop them until it's too late. Mr. Stark, I apologize on my friend's behalf, he does not have an off button." He said in the most apologetic tone he could muster.

Much to John's surprise, Tony waved him off and began to question Sherlock in more detail as to how he deduced everything.

Seeing that a crisis had been averted and the two geniuses were bonding, Natasha led John over to a slightly awkward man who was attempting to blend into the background.

"John, meet Bruce Banner. I think you both with get along. Bruce is usually the one who keeps Stark in line if Steve is not around when he gets mouthy." she said with a small smile.

Tony finished talking to Sherlock and walked over, urging that they discuss more science later. He looked on in surprise at seeing the smile on Natasha's face.

"What's this? The Black Widow can smile? The world must be ending! He said with a dramatic gasp

"Funny Stark, John's an old friend of mine. Clint and I met him a couple years ago." she replied, remembering John's cover story.

"Wow. You have things like that?" Tony asked while giving John another look over.

Deciding he was finished, he glanced over to Sherlock. "Did you know your friend has two assassins for buddies before today?"

"I was unaware until we were introduced." Sherlock replied with just a hint of grumpiness in his voice.

Sherlock was still miffed that John had managed to keep secrets from him. It seemed like he always managed to throw a curve at him when it felt like he gotten everything right. He leaned against the couch and gave John a look that conveyed that he had questions and they would get answered. A little annoyed that they were getting off topic, Steve sighed and had a feeling it was just going to get worse. Of course, Tony would find someone to bond with and talk on his level other than Bruce.

He walked to stand by Tony and folded his arms with a serious look. "Either way, we should get to business. Judging by Stark's reaction, you might actually get the answers that your government wants." he said, vowing to make sure Tony took things seriously for once.

Steve didn't miss the eye roll that Tony gave him. There was no time for childish games and he wanted him to be responsible. People were still on their back after the whole attack in Manhattan and it would be good for them to have peace with other governments. He was taken aback slightly as Sherlock mimicked the same eye roll Tony just gave him. Oh, it was official. Tony just didn't meet another genius. He just met his damn British twin to match him in snarkiness.

"Oh how boring. I don't actually want to give Mycroft everything. He might never let me live it down. No, I have the basics of what he wants; all I need to know is if there will be any more attacks in the foreseeable future." Sherlock said with a slight sneer at having to mention his brother.

Oh, it was official. Tony just didn't meet another genius. He just met his damn British twin to match him in snarky words. God, he could already imagine something horrible like the two managing to take over the world. He wouldn't put it past Tony if he actually put his mind to it. Though, the name that Sherlock put out did make Steve remember the sharp suited man. None of the Avengers were fond of the man from the few times that he gotten into contact with them.

"I really couldn't tell that wouldn't happen. It seems like other planets really like attacking Earth on a whim. Not to mention the super villains we have to deal with. I assume that Mycroft wanted to try a different approach this time?" Steve said, wondering why Sherlock even bothered if he didn't want to come.

Sherlock scoffed at Steve 'assuming' that Mycroft try anything new. Mycroft knew exactly what he was doing. There was almost no reason for them to stay. Steve just gave him the answer that he needed. Taking his phone out his pocket, Sherlock started to type out a text to Mycroft explaining what he knew.

"Mycroft is my arch enemy despite what he may say. I came here as…payment for something my brother did recently. But, I already know everything I wish to tell him." Sherlock replied as he finished firing off the text.

Tony couldn't help but wince at hearing Sherlock's explanation. He was never happier to be an only child in his whole life. He leaned over to give Sherlock a quick pat on the shoulder and said, "Geez. And here I thought that Thor had family issues."

Tony's words caused John to flinch and pause in his conversation with Bruce. He really did enjoy seeing Natasha and Clint again. If it was any other time, he would love to stay for a few days and catch up with them. He rarely got to see them with their lives so vastly different. But, if they did stay, it was inevitable that John would run into Thor. That would be a very bad thing.

Turning his head to Sherlock tried giving his best tired smile and said, "Sherlock, since you have already had everything you need, why don't we head back? I'm certain Lestrade will need you soon."

Sherlock looked up from his phone and stared at John. That was very suspicious. John was never ready to leave when they went on a trip. John was usually the one telling Sherlock that he needed to get out of London more often. He frowned, knowing that John was hiding something. He was going to find out what it was and Sherlock knew that they would have to stay to get more answers.

"John, I am surprised at you. You're refusing your friends' hospitality after not seeing them for so long? What do you have planned that is so important that cannot wait until tomorrow or later?" Sherlock said with a smirk, faking a shocked tone.

John mentally cursed Sherlock at being so damn suspicious in general. He knew he shouldn't have pushed the issue. Now, Sherlock was going to try to do everything he could to see what he was hiding. He'd been hiding his secret for years and not even Sherlock Holmes was going to find out if it was the last thing to do. Rubbing the back of his head, John managed to get a yawn out to convey how tired he was. He truly did want to lie down after the whole flight. His body was still running on London time.

"Nothing. I'm just a bit jet lagged is all; I think I will hit the hay. Clint? Natasha? You guys free tomorrow? It would be nice to catch up some more before we go back home. You can take me on a tour of the city." John said.

Clint nodded with a smile, more than happy to have an excuse to use his day off. Maybe they could get a spar in for old times' sake. Patting John on the back, he suggested showing him back to his flat to rest. John gave a real grin to Clint and let him take the lead back to his flat. He was going to ask Sherlock if he was coming along until he saw that he that Tony had dragged him over to sit near Bruce. He could hear some scientific terms from the conversation and chuckled.

"Sherlock, make sure to actually eat if you're going to stay up tonight. It's been two days and you need sleep. Don't get into trouble." he called out as he followed Clint, only a wave of the hand that he was heard.

It didn't take long to get back to the flat as he thought. He memorized the way in case he got lost, thanking Clint as left. He walked inside and looked around once more with a sigh. Hopefully, they would be gone before Thor returned. John mulled over the thought as he got ready for bed. Telling himself not to get so worked up, he got comfortable and didn't take long to fall asleep.

_John was in the medical bay, checking what supplies needed restocking. It was always a damn hassle to keep it filled with the sparring the warriors did every day. It was something that he did enjoy though. It was a quiet and very relaxing task that could always calm him. He jumped slightly as the door slammed opened behind him, turning around to see who it was. Thor walked in with his cape billowing as he did so, coming to clasp John firmly by the shoulders. _

_"Congratulations are in order, my friend!" he said cheerfully, a wide smile plastered on his face._

_John gave a questioning look at Thor, blinking a few times in confusion. He heard Loki was looking for a partner for marriage. He let out a surprised sound as Thor lifted him off the floor in a hug. _

_"Congratulations for what, may I ask?" John asked, trying to get Thor to put him down._

_"Of your betrothal of course! I have never seen my brother so happy. I give both of you my full blessing! My brother has made a wonderful choice!" Thor answered, oblivious to John's look of shock._

_John packed as fast as he could. He took a few spare clothes and some food for his trip. He needed to leave before Loki arrived. It was just be better to sneak off without him knowing. He would be arriving any second and it would cause less problems if he came to see an empty room. He stiffened at hearing a knock on the door before Loki poked his head in. He walked in with a gentle smile on his face and quickly noticed the bag John was packing. _

_"What's this? Already planning to move into my chambers? I did not know word had gotten around so fast. I could help if you wish." Loki said with a chuckle, leaning on the bedpost near John._

_Saying nothing in response, John gathered the last of his things. He couldn't help but shiver as Loki leaned over his shoulder while he checked that he had everything he needed. Looking at the bag with more interest, Loki gave a wider smile and touched his arm._

_"John? Do you want me to call servants to help move your things?"_

_As Loki said this, John closed up his bag and turned his head to him with a sad smile. _

_"Loki, I'm not marrying you." he said calmly._

_Loki's smile left his face and was replaced with confusion. He obviously didn't understand why John would say such a thing. _

_"What? Of course you are. I have gotten the All Father's approval and Mother has already begun the plans." he said, the confusion quickly changing into anger._

_It pained John to see the look on Loki's face. He couldn't give the reason of why he didn't want to marry him at the moment. He had a feeling that Loki wouldn't understand. He slowly reached into his pocket to take out a pinch of sleeping powder. Loki could not follow him. He would make sure of it. _

_"I'm truly sorry." was all he said as he blew the silver powder into Loki's face. _

_A look of murderous rage went across Loki's face, the effects of the powder starting to work. John grabbed Loki by the arms and steered him onto the bed. He dodged the hands that grabbed at him, slinging his bag over his shoulder as he moved to the door. Loki was still trying to follow him._

_"I am leaving. Please do not come after me." John said, seeing Loki finally succumb to the effects of the powder as ran out the door._

_John stood in front of Heimdall and noticed the curious look on his face. It was rare for anyone to come to the Rainbow Bridge alone. He knew he only had a short window of time until Loki woke up and would look for him. _

_"I ask that you send me to Midgard, old friend." he said seriously._

_"You would leave Asgard for a self-banishment?" Heimdall asked with surprise in his voice. _

_John figured that would be the question he would get. He would never be able to come to Asgard again if he banished himself. He would miss his true home. But, he couldn't stay and become married. He could try and start a new life on Earth. The latter outcome was much more preferable than the former._

_"Not a banishment, but freedom. I fear Loki will not take my reply so kindly and it would be best if I were gone. "John muttered as he shifted the bag of his shoulder." I would also ask that you not tell anyone where you have sent me."_

_He knew that he was asking a lot from Heimdall. It would be more than dangerous if anyone found out what he was doing. Most likely, he would be called a traitor. There would be no forgiveness from the Allfather for not going through the marriage to his son. Heimdall's expression suddenly became thoughtful and took in John's words. _

_"You do realize he will not give up so easily. If he were to find you, he will not be opposed to using force to bring you back." Heimdall said quietly as he turned his gaze to the bridge._

John awoke slowly wondering why he dreamt of those memories again. Throwing an arm over his eyes, he took a few deep breaths and tried to relax. It had been a long time since he had dreamt of home so vividly. Plus, he couldn't sit in bed all day. Natasha and Clint were spending the day with him.

"Good morning, Dr. Watson. It is currently 9 AM and 23°C. I recommend wearing a light jacket to fend off the wind." JARVIS said, making John sit up in surprise.

John looked around for the person who said that. There was no one in the room with him. He really hoped that he wasn't hearing things.

"I am sorry for starling you, Dr. Watson. I am JARVIS and I run the tower."

John realized he was actually talking to some kind of built in robot. How could he forget that he was in a building Tony Stark created? Making some kind of AI messenger was probably child's play. Getting out of the bed, John started to do his morning routine and get ready for breakfast.

"I have been asked to inform you that Thor has returned. He will be ready to meet you and Mr. Holmes at breakfast. Do you need directions to the kitchen?" JARVIS asked.

John faltered in his step as he finished toweling off from the shower. Was the universe working against him or something? It really wasn't fair.

The two thoughts that raced in his mind were, 'Get the hell out there!' and 'Calm down. If I keep my head low, he'll have no reason to be suspicious.' After a few moments, John composed himself and decided to follow the logic of the second thought. After all, there was only a slim chance Thor would recognize him. John finished dressing and took his time to gather his thoughts. After getting directions from JARVIS, he left his flat to go get some breakfast.

Sherlock was sitting on an island in the middle of the kitchen floor with Tony and Bruce sitting in the bar stools beside it. They were all in their clothes from yesterday. Sherlock and Tony were talking about something to do with chemicals that worried John a bit. The detective's hair looked more untamed than usual and Tony was using rapid hand gestures to explain whatever he was saying. Poor Bruce was passed out in his breakfast. Clint, Steve, and Natasha were hanging around the dining table on the other side of the room near the appliances. Each were nursing a coffee and eating their breakfast like normal people.

Sherlock rolled his eyes at Tony's arguments over different corrosive acids. He did experiments like that already. The man was better suited for robotics anyway. Turning his head, he saw John walk into the room and staring at them with an amused expression.

"John, where have you been? You missed the tour of Stark's labs." Sherlock said, watching John go get himself some coffee.

John found a clean mug and filled it with coffee as he replied, "I was getting sleep like a normal person and not putting people to sleep in their meals."

"But** John**, I needed to hear his thoughts on gamma radiation and sleep is dull."

"It's true." Tony chimed in as he lifted Bruce's head out of his plate. "If I had slept half the time most people do I would have never been able to invent as much as I have."

Figures. Sherlock met someone that ignored sleep like he was some kind of superhuman too. He could only imagine the person who had to make sure that Tony remembered to eat and sleep.

"But the tradeoff is that you're addicted to caffeine and you've shaved years off your life."

John stared at the two in exasperation as the two ignored him for in favor of talking more science. The two were getting along really well, which was saying something. Sherlock generally didn't get along with anyone. He took another sip of his coffee as he decided how to phrase his next question.

By the way, how long has it been since you two slept?" he asked.

In response, John got two blank looks. Of course, they didn't the last time they slept. They probably didn't even know what day it was.

John shook his head with a sigh, saying, "Go get some sleep you two. Doctor's orders. Take Bruce with you. Caffeine can't replace a good night's sleep."

Thor entered the room in the middle of John's lecture, and at seeing Tony talking with two strangers, he remarked, "Who is it that commands the man of science into slumber?"

John froze at hearing Thor's voice. Steeling his nerves, he turned to face the Norse god with the most open and genial face he could muster.

"Dr. John Watson here," he said. "I'm Sherlock's friend, companion and blogger." At the word "blogger", Thor looked confused.

"What is this blogging you speak of, son of Wat?"

_Ah. Of course he wouldn't know about blogging,_ thought John. John thought of how to explain this concept to Thor; after all, he would know better than anyone here about Thor's learning difficulties.

"Ah, well…I use computers to tell others about the cases me and Sherlock –"

"The thin man over there, he is the Sherlock you speak of?"

"Yes. I tell about the cases he and I investigate. The adventures we go on are quite interesting, really. Rather popular stories, they are."

"I see, Son of Wat. So you are a storyteller! We have such a tradition on my home, in Asgard." "I could regale you with many a tale! But if you would be so kind as to explain how this…computer…helps you?"

"Okay, big guy," Tony interjected as he was heading toward the door. "Let John go about his business and I promise I'll explain everything to you later, after I get some shut eye. That okay?" Thor nodded in agreement, before turning back to John.

"It has been a pleasure to meet you, Watson. I look forward to exchanging many tales with you." Thor smiled warmly before leaving the room. Tony, Sherlock and Bruce had already left. John then turned to Clint and Natasha.

"You all ready to head out?" he asked.

"Almost. Clint needs to grab some arrows from Stark's lab. They're supposed to be a special new type," said Natasha. Clint was still bent over his coffee, with a sleepy look in his eyes.

"Ah. Well I'll just pop in on Sherlock and make sure he's properly passed out in his room. For being a genius, he can be an ignorant berk about things like food and sleep." The three of them laughed. "Right, I'm off. See you in 15 minutes." John turned and walked out of the kitchen, towards the elevators.

As John stepped into the elevator, Thor suddenly slipped in as the doors closed. _Shit_, John thought. There was nobody around to distract from Thor's attention now. John was silently panicking.

"Thor! What are you doing here?" John internally winced at how accusatory he sounded. He inhaled deeply, and reminded himself to keep calm and do everything to avoid suspicion.

"I used the restrooms," Thor replied.

_'Okay, John, be reasonable and make some small talk.' _he thought.

"Ah, I should use the loo myselfbefore I head out." Confusion flashed across Thor's face momentarily. There was a brief silence before Thor spoke again.

"I once knew another Watson. You and he have many similarities. I wonder if you two are not the same person." Thor laughed heartily; John much less so. He kept repeating to himself that it was only a joke, no matter how close to the truth it was. When the elevator finally stopped on Sherlock's floor, John felt immensely relieved.

"Well, it was really a pleasure, Thor," John said, always mindful of his manners.

"I agree. Take care, Watson." The moment the elevator doors closed, John nearly collapsed with relief.

"Are you okay, sir? You seem to be weak and are shaking." JARVIS' voice came through the speakers.

"Yes. Oh, god yes," John said. He hadn't even been aware until that moment that he was shaking hard. He stood up and leaned against Sherlock's door for a moment of composure. John thanked the gods for his massive stroke of luck. He had been face to face with Thor—twice—and hadn't had his cover blown. He also felt tremendously grateful that Sherlock hadn't been present during that episode in the elevator. Thor may have been slow, but John was certain that nothing would have escaped Sherlock. John steeled himself, willing his body and mind to be calm and carry on coolly. He was a self-exiled Asgardian. He was an army doctor, fighting on the front lines, for God's sake! A consulting detective and the god of thunder were far from the worst of his hardships. John took a deep breath and entered Sherlock's room.

Inside, Sherlock was seated in a chair, sound asleep. His head was leaned back and tilted to one side, mouth slightly ajar. John smiled and walked over to him, brushing his dark, tousled curls away from his face. He leaned over Sherlock and picked him up by the shoulders, talking softly to him.

"Alright, Sherlock, I'm going to put you to bed." Sherlock grabbed his wrists in an effort to steady himself, but John tucked an arm behind Sherlock's knees and had him up in the air, before laying him in the bed. Sherlock was too tired to protest, and simply fell back asleep. John smiled and walked out.

_If only all my dealings with Sherlock were so easy,_ he thought.

As he left, he glimpsed himself in the mirror. John reared back in surprise at how paled he looked; the encounter with Thor really shook him more than he thought. John stared at his reflection, thinking soothing thoughts until some color returned. He continued soothing himself on the entire ride down to the lobby. When he spotted Clint and Natasha, they greeted him without looking concerned. John figured that he must have looked decent, and figured that for now, his problems were behind him. He shoved the morning's events to the back of his mind and slipped into the van, ready to face the day.


End file.
